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#30338
Antoinette Martin
Participant

Hi all, I’m Antoinette, and I’m another facebook defector : )
This forum instinctively feels good and safe – thankyou Leanne for creating this.

However, I’ve been struggling to get here as my life is currently in uproar (I’m in the middle of moving house and selling my shack, whilst still in Stage 4 lockdown in Melbourne. Yeah – I know!).
So a lot of old stuff is being triggered by stress, even though I’m meditating daily and trying to manage my stress.
From many years of getting to know my stress responses, I recognise that I tend to get a bit manic and dissociative. So even though I don’t have bipolar disorder, Depression can often manifest as mania in me. I feel as though I have a spring my bum at the moment! I also recognise that in myself, it’s also physiological – with exhausted adrenals. And then I tend to drink wine too often under stress, (this is a behaviour I developed during a traumatic life event).

I thought I’d dive right in and lay this out here, because the posts by others above have opened up the opportunity for me to be vulnerable here.

Also, Leanne – I’ve been looking at the Safety and Security ebook today. I had some insights as a result, and I feel as though I need to go back to the beginning (of how to be a human!). I realise I emotionally deprive myself in ways I would never do to another. It caught me completely off-guard. These times of stress/crisis can be openers, in a way. I’m out of my comfort zone and it’s pushing me to look at my self-isolation.

Warmest wishes to all
xx Antoinette